Week of 12/09/2019

The 2019 Brutally Honest Awards
- by David Matthews 2

So here we are again... end of yet another year.

If it seems like time is just flying, apparently it’s not your imagination... it’s that you’re getting old.  Well, that’s according to a new study that came out a few weeks ago.  Funny, it seems like it just came out yesterday.

Anyway, let’s get to it before we get too old to remember what happened.

The Biggest Losers For 2019: The United States of America – And let’s get brutally honest here... as long as Narcissist President Donald Trump is in office, the United States will continue losing.  Just like last year.

The Biggest Winner for 2019: Russian Leader Vladimir Putin – Same reason.  Come to think of it, it was the same reason in previous years that he’s won.

The Biggest Turnaround for 2019: House Speaker Nancy Pelosi – Pelosi went from being Narcissist Trump’s second-best ally and enabler to the biggest thorn in the orange-stained narcissist’s side.  And it has to do with one thing: impeachment.  Her decision to finally... *finally*... get the ball rolling on impeachment for Narcissist Trump’s criminal acts of bribery and obstruction has showed that she has some measure of duty to the American people.

Understand this: we started 2019 with Pelosi refusing to support anything resembling impeachment!  She even said as much this past March!  Even after the release of the failure that is the Mueller Report, Pelosi pumped the brakes on any kind of talk of impeachment.  It took Narcissist Trump being himself and going that one step further with bribing and extorting the Ukrainian government for his own political purposes for her to finally find the ovaries to do the right thing.  And this wasn’t about something that was done before Narcissist Trump ran for office, like the various alleged sexual assault from the 1990’s.  This was something that happened this year! 

And just a reminder: bribery *is* specifically mentioned in the United States Constitution as one of the justifications for impeachment.  Look it up if you don’t believe me.

Biggest And Most Disgusting Lapdog For Narcissist Trump in 2019 (tie): Attorney General Robert Barr, Senator Lindsey Graham, Congressman Matt Goetz – There are actually a whole plethora of Trump Party (formerly GOP) members that can qualify, but these three are the biggest and worst.  Surprisingly, Senate Majority Leader and perpetual turtle-dick Mitch “The Bitch” McConnell did not make the cut.

Biggest Letdown in 2019: The Mueller Report – Yes, even though yours truly warned just last year that the screwjob was coming with Robert Mueller’s much hyped report on Narcissist Trump, that still doesn’t mean it wasn’t a letdown for the American people. 

Yes, Mueller was hamstringed from the beginning by Narcissist Trump’s own handlers by saying that Orange Stain could not be indicted.  But he still gave only subtle nudges to the House of Representatives that they should impeach Narcissist Trump, aka “Individual 1”, which was not enough to get past Speaker Pelosi (who had yet to find her ovaries), and it led the Narcissist-in-Chief to proclaim absolute vindication.

Worse yet, it was followed by Narcissist Trump committing bribery with the Ukrainian government, which could very well lead to his impeachment as soon as this month.  So, if Mueller didn’t follow the supposed “guidelines” and actually indicted Narcissist Trump, or even openly called for impeachment after his report instead of giving mealy-mouthed “suggestions”, then maybe Narcissist Trump wouldn’t have committed another criminal act.

The “Unflushed Turd” Award for 2019: Narcissist President Donald Trump – Because it’s always all about him, don’t you know?

One of the hardest things this commentator tried to do in 2019 was to not make every article about Narcissist Trump.  To avoid talking about the Orange Stain.  To not mention Trumpaconallus.  Talk about abusive business practices.  Talk about Big Tech.  Talk about how certain ideas to fix the abusive economy – like healthcare – will inevitably fail.  Even talk about the upcoming 2020 con-job and all the wannabes, including some who really didn’t consider running.  But, no matter what, he keeps popping back up like an unflushed turd.  Hence the award.

The Worst Narcissist Trump-Wannabe for 2019: Ex-“Papa” John Schnatter – Poor John.  He gets booted out of his own business for something he said last year.  Then he starts in on some diatribe about how he had “40 pizzas in 30 days” and how they don’t “taste” like they should and that supposedly reflects on the people who replaced him, and then he promises that “a day of reckoning will come”.

Poor John.  Poor Pizza Stain.  You had 40 pizzas in 30 days?  Even when I was in college and I practically lived on Domino’s Pizza every day, I didn’t eat more than one pizza a day.  And it wasn’t even consumed all that evening.  I practically invented the idea of “breakfast pizza”.  But even then, it wasn’t 40 pizzas in 30 days. 

You got problems, John.  You need help.

Oh, and his wife left him and filed for divorce, saying their marriage was “broken”.  No doubt!

The Worst Thing About 2019: The Dominance of “Fake” – From fan castings and fan theories being passed off as “news articles” to daily campaign “polls” that are nothing more than fantasy politics, we’ve been inundated with phoniness.  We’re being marketed to by influencers who are more interested in getting you to buy product than in knowing who you are or sharing what their day is really like.

Back in August I pointed out a great TED Talk video by actor Joseph Gordon-Levitt about creativity versus getting attention.  If you haven’t seen it yet, I urge you to and think for a minute about what we’ve been focusing more on lately.

I’m not going to delude myself to think that I have droves of fans and followers.  A lot of those “likes” and “follows” on my Instagram and Twitter accounts are not who they pretend to be.  But I’d rather be myself and creative to a handful of people than to be fake and get thousands of fake followers.  You’ve seen what happens to some of those folks.

Best Superhero Movie for 2019: “Avengers: Endgame” – As if there would be anything better this year?  Maybe you were expecting me to say it was “Brightburn” or “Joker”?  Sorry, but I have no intentions on seeing either of them unless it’s on the movie channels and I am bored out of my skull.  “Captain Marvel” and “Spider-Man: Far From Home” were okay.  “Shazam” was okay.  It was “Endgame” that really took it all for 2019.

The Most Disgusting Trend in Comics for 2019: DC Comics and their Sick Villain Fetish – For the past few years, DC Comics has gone on a really sick fetish for villains.  Whether it is to give villains like Lex Luthor their “year”, or to give them their own comic, or their personal favorite of turning superheroes into villains – as seen in the two “Injustice” games which actually led to 3 comic series – DC Comics has become the mastermind for villains, and thus the archenemy for comic book fans who are, finally, getting sick of it.  They even had their own “zombie apocalypse” morbid fetish series “DCeased”, which, like Marvel’s never-ending sick zombie fetish, does not end well.

Folks, if you’re sick of it as is this commentator, then there is an alternative.  Look at some of the other comic publishers, including (cheap self-promoting plug) Battlerock Comics.  And maybe, after DC and Marvel lose enough supporters, they might get the goddamned hint and make it about the heroes again.

And finally...

The Last Word For 2019: To Narcissist President Trump – At some point in the next few weeks there will most likely be articles of impeachment being brought up and voted on.  We could very well start 2020 with you being impeached.  That is a stain that you cannot get rid of.  Even if the Senate fails to convict you (which would most likely happen), it does not “un-impeach” you, any more than it did for President Bill Clinton.  That impeachment is a part of his legacy, especially for what he was impeached for.  Being impeached also does not negate your election any more than getting caught in affairs negate your current marriage.

And I will say this, sir: if you are impeached, you have done that to yourself!

I’ve mentioned earlier that Speaker Pelosi did not want impeachment earlier in the year.  She was the best enabler that you could ask for in the House.  She wanted to work with you, not want you gone.  What changed all that?  You did!  You couldn’t leave well enough alone after the Mueller Report fizzled.

Maybe it was just in your nature.  You’ve gotten used to having your way for so long that maybe you just couldn’t help but mess with the Ukrainians just because.  But the point remains that this is still on you.  You chose the action, and nobody has even tried to disprove it.  All you and your enablers have been doing is maligning the people who are calling you on it, much like Ralph Cifaretto in “The Sopranos” excused his actions by maligning the victims.

So, yes, if you are impeached during the holiday break, it is on you, sir.  And like the stain on a certain blue dress, that impeachment will also be a part of your legacy.  Deny it all you want.  Scream “Witch Hunt” until your lungs burn and your Twitter fingers fall off.  It doesn’t change that you’ve been identified as the Wicked Witch of the West Wing.  Because truth is not partisan.  Only phoniness is.

See you in 2020.

Week of 12/02/2019

The “Money Man” Spoilers
– by David Matthews 2

Remember that time when it was suggested that a millionaire or a billionaire would do a far better job as President of the United States than a career politician?  That time when a supposed businessman was the best qualification for the highest office in the land.  Remember that?  They would know how to best manage money, because they’ve already proved it in the business world, and they couldn’t be influenced by special interests because they would have their own money.  Remember?  And we believed it!  And by “we” that also includes this commentator.

Now before you start saying his name... no I am not talking about Narcissist Donald Trump.

I am referring the late H. Ross Perot, third-party wannabe for the White House and – in all likelihood – was just one flake-out away from being the President of the United States of America back in 1992.

Yes, the same arguments used by the orange-skinned narcissist two decades later were first used by Perot and his supporters.  The argument that only a successful businessman, only a millionaire, or even a billionaire, could “fix” America.

Before his flake-out in the summer of 92, Perot was considered by many people to be a serious challenge to then-President George H.W. Bush and then-Governor Bill Clinton.  He used his money to buy political infomercials to get his name on the ballot in every state.  He appealed to the everyman in ways that neither Bush Senior nor Clinton really could.

And then, of course, he flaked out.  And then, after his name was officially on the ballot in every state, he “flaked-in”, and still had enough draw to get almost a quarter of the votes come Election Day.

Since then, the idea of a “businessman president” would continue to resound in the minds of certain people that were sick of career politicians and special interest groups screwing things up.  And that became one of the key draws when it came to a certain orange-skinned narcissist in his eventual Napoleonic quest for the White House.  People saw the brand that Narcissist Trump cultivated over the years and they interpreted that as “success”. 

Of course, reality – and quite a few documentaries you can see on Netflix – show that Narcissist Trump isn’t as “successful” he claims to be in the world of business.  His current bungling of trade and international agreements show that his tenure as president matches his many failed business dealings.  I mean, seriously, who bankrupts a casino?

But the argument that a supposed “money man” is more qualified to be president than a career politician is still resounding in the minds of certain people seeking to replace Narcissist Trump.

Two supposed “money men” have now become presidential wannabes for the Democratic Party’s nomination in the 2020 Con-job.  Tom Steyer and the former NYC mayor Michael Bloomberg have thrown their hats and moneybags into the already crowded ring of wannabes.  Steyer is known among the Democrats, but Bloomberg has been more of political renegade, serving as an independent as mayor and helping several GOP (now Trump Party) politicians in the past.  Both, in their own ways, think that their status as “money men” make them the only ones that can stop Narcissist Trump from serving another despotic term in office.

And yet they could very well be the ones that keep Narcissist Trump in despotism for at least four more years.

The biggest selling point of these two candidates is their money and their respective successes in the world of business.

Steyer is a hedge fund manager.  In other words, he knows how to make rich people even richer.  Remember the Great Recession?  He may not have caused it, but he certainly came from the group that were part of the problem.  Granted, he has since used his own money to advance progressive causes, but to call him a successful businessman is a bit of misnomer.  He is a successful money manager.  That may be a business, but not one in the traditional sense.  He’s not a Sam Walton kind of businessman, who creates brick-and-mortar businesses that employ average people and tries to appeal to Mister and Missus Middle-Class America.

And there is the problem right there.  Narcissist Trump’s appeal and the source of his cult followers are from that segment of the great unwashed.  The ones that watch Fox Spin and Fox Business Spin.  The ones that shop at Walmart.  That may seem to be a contradiction, given Narcissist Trump’s preference for wealth and golden toilets, but it was the group that was cultivated by Fox Spin and talk radio long before he decided to run for office, and now those are “his” people.  All they see in Steyer is that he’s another one of those filthy rich people who don’t know a thing about them and their struggles.

Bloomberg is an actual businessman, not to mention a media mogul in his own right.  Granted, he too comes from the money-side of the business world, as his media service appeals to the same groups that Steyer came from, but he also has actual public service under his belt, serving as mayor of New York City for three consecutive terms – one more than the term limits law allowed.

Bloomberg’s third mayoral term could actually work against the Dems as it feeds the notion that Narcissist Trump should also ignore term limits and turn his despotism into the very “president-for-life” position that he has previously hinted he desired.  Plus, during his three terms in office, Bloomberg screwed over a lot of people in the city, including groups that he now has to suck up to in order to get support.

Making matters worse for Bloomberg is his asinine decision to skip the early primaries and caucuses in New Hampshire, Iowa, Nevada, and South Carolina, focusing his money and efforts on winning those “super” primaries and caucuses that happen later in the year.  If you’re from those first four states, would you really want to support a candidate that has decided that you are not worth his time?  Progressives may argue that we should all vote for a ham sandwich before casting another vote for Narcissist Trump, but keep in mind that Hillary Clinton’s snubbing of certain states in 2016 worked against her, and Bloomberg’s snub can also work against him and in Narcissist Trump’s favor.

But, really, Steyer’s and Bloomberg’s argument that a “money man” makes for a better leader is ultimately irrelevant.  That has been Narcissist Trump’s sales pitch since 2016, and, even if it’s just a con, and even if he isn’t the successful businessman that he claimed to be, that is still *his* sales pitch.  And you cannot truly succeed in beating Narcissist Trump by trying to out-Trump him with his own pitch.

Let’s get brutally honest here... Tom Steyer and Michael Bloomberg are really nothing more than late-coming spoilers in a race already overcrowded by wannabes.  Sure, they bring money into the race, but it’s not for the wannabes that have been spending the past year travelling and speaking and trying to get supporters and funds.  Rather, it’s for themselves.  It’s money that would be better spent helping those that have been out there trying to get their message out that there is a better alternative to the self-promoting clown act with the fake Jersey tan.  Find the candidate that closely matches your views and then sugar-daddy that candidate!  It’s a whole lot easier to appeal to the voters that way than to try to buy your way in outright.

If anything, Narcissist Trump has pretty much ruined the argument for a “businessman leader” for at least the next few elections.  Every time someone suggests that a “businessman” would be better running the country than a politician, people are going point to Narcissist Trump as the reason why that argument is patently wrong.  They’re going to point to his trade war and his reckless explosion of the debt and the failure of his tax changes to help out hard-working Americans and the slump of the economy and then ask you if you think those were better with a supposed “businessman” in charge

Steyer and Bloomberg need to understand that when the problem is Narcissist Trump, and you’re trying to remove him, the last thing that you want to be is anything like him.